Cupid Gone Wild
by sailor aidos
Summary: The god of love himself stirs up strange emotions and reversals of interests amongst the HxH characters! Irumi runs from his brother, Hisoka refuses a date and Kurapika forgets his revenge.
1. Prologue

**_A/N:_** Just for fun! This is a story I came up with by mixing one of my fave Greek myths and exploring 'what-ifs' in my fave anime series. If you're not into myths, please bear with the retelling in the prologue, it's crucial to the story. Bdw, I know that Cupid is Eros in Greek myth but the name 'Cupid' is more popular and _kawaii_. 

**_Disclaimer:_** Yoshihiro Togashi owns Hunter X Hunter, not me 

**CUPID GONE WILD**

**Prologue:** Don't mess with Love

It was a fine day and Cupid was playing with his bow and arrows out in the field. Apollo, that golden-haired and handsome god of light, was also out walking and saw the very cute god of love. Realizing he had nothing better to do, he decided to have some fun and unluckily for Cupid, he was going to be the source of it…or not.

"Playing with your little bow and arrow, Cupid?" Apollo said in the manner of one talking to a two-year old. "How very cute!"

Cupid ignored him and continued playing. He was thinking though, "_Stupid, puffed-up, muscle for brains_!"

Apollo stuck out his broad, manly chest, combed his golden curls backwards and flashed a 100-megawatt voltage smile. "Can you really hurt someone with those little things? I mean look at me," Cupid did look at him, with a glare, but Apollo still smiled condescendingly, "I am the god of Light, I have a golden chariot, I have nine beautiful muses to attend me…blah, blah, yada, yada," he went on and on.

Cupid gave a little yawn. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a nymph, Daphne was her name, picking some flowers. He gave Apollo a mischievous smile. Then standing up straight, he took his bow and shot an arrow of love straight at the chest of a surprised, but yes still talking, Apollo. In almost the same breath, he took an arrow of indifference and shot it at Daphne.

"Wha−!" Apollo said stunned while clutching a hand to his chest. He looked at his chest then looked up again to glare at Cupid but Cupid was nowhere to be found. His eyes then settled on the nymph who was also obviously still recovering from the shot.

Their eyes met. However, while one flamed with ardent admiration and desire, the other widened with apprehension and disgust. Daphne had recognized the fierce emotion in Apollo's eyes. She gave a yelp, dropped her flowers and turned to run, very, very fast.

Apollo gave chase immediately. He called out desperately, "Daphne, my beautiful nymph! Please don't run from me. I love you!"

"Aiiieeeeeee!" Daphne cried and ran faster. But no matter how hard and fast she ran, Apollo was slowly gaining on her. Well, he wasn't one of the 12 great Olympian gods for nothing after all.

While running, Apollo continued to plead for Daphne to stop and promise her his heart, his riches and undying love. Not a good idea though because this caused Daphne to panic even more. They were now close to the stream where Daphne's father lived. In utter desperation, Daphne called out, "Father! Father! Please help me!"

Scarcely were the words out that Daphne stopped in her tracks. Apollo reached out then tried to put his arms around her. But what he embraced wasn't a soft and warm feminine form, instead he felt the hard bark of a tree. Daphne's father had granted her wish, albeit a little creatively. He made her into a tree, the laurel tree.

Apollo was disconsolate when he realized what had happened. He continued to stroke the tree lovingly and murmur sweet words to it being the lovesick fool he was. Finally he said, "If you can't be my wife, then you will be my tree." Thus, from thereon, ancient Olympian champions wore crowns of laurel leaves…but that is another story.

Cupid had been watching everything from atop another tree and he was quite enjoying himself. He stuck a tongue out at the ridiculous, tree-talking god of light. He then cupped his chin with one hand and said to himself, "_Served him right! I wonder, though, wouldn't it be great fun to see others acting silly like him?_"

The more he thought about it, the more it filled him with ungod-like glee. He resolved to start at once and flapped his wings to fly…

XXXXXXXXX

Cupid had been traveling through space and through time. He had shot his arrows all throughout history and at the most unlikely people to get together. And so, the very handsome and brave Tamahome fell for the utterly hopeless Miaka, Mamoru and Seiya both fall for the even sillier Usagi, and even perfectly logical Bulma got together with the prince of arrogance himself, Vegeta.

Now Cupid was still flying, looking for new targets. He now had a maniacal light to his eyes that complemented his wide, malicious grin. He saw a mountain before him and would have passed it but then he saw that there was a large mansion on top of it. It was a _very_ large mansion. "Well, well, who could be living in that house?" Cupid said as he glided towards it.

Good question. It was the Zoaldyke mansion.


	2. Kirua's Brotherly Love

**_Disclaimer:_** Yoshihiro Togashi owns Hunter X Hunter, not me 

**CUPID GONE WILD**

**Chapter 1:** Kirua's Brotherly Love

Kirua was extremely uncomfortable. This was turning out to be a Zoaldyke family day. He was eating dinner and he was used to taking it in his room or sitting at the grand, dining table with just one or two of his family members who happen to be at home. Tonight however, everyone had shown up including _him_.

"Oh, I'm so happy. All my sons are here," Kikyuo said trying to stifle an affected sob with a lace handkerchief; she was sitting at one end of the elegant table. "Of course, I'm always happy to see you Kirua," she added to her favorite son.

Kirua ignored her then encountered his grandfather's gaze. Zeno rolled his eyes at his daughter-in-law's dramatics and Kirua had to return a smile. He stopped however as he risked a look at his father.

Silver was sitting of course at the head of the table and Kirua was sitting at his left side. Kirua didn't have anything to worry about because Silver just gave a bland smile to his wife, "Yes," he simply murmured and continued to sip from his wine glass.

Kirua didn't feel particularly hungry. Well, he _did_ just eat all of the chocolate balls he had put in his room but that wasn't exactly the reason. He tried not to let his eyes wander and concentrate on the plate before him but you could only stare at a piece of meat and some vegetables for only so long.

He tried to watch the other members of the family, anything but to look at _him_. "_Eeew_," Kirua thought as averted his gaze from Miruki who was _literally_ attacking his plate. His gaze swept from his mother to Karuto who was slicing his meat _very, very_ neatly. His youngest brother looked up at that moment and gave Kirua one of his expressionless but enigmatic gazes.

"_Man! He's starting to be like…_" Without meaning to, his eyes went on their volition to the one sitting across from him, the one whose pair of eyes he had always been trying to avoid. And, as it always happens, Irumi met his gaze.

His eldest brother's deep-set but unfathomable eyes stared back at him and he gave a small smile. He was holding his knife and fork and to Kirua, it looked as if Irumi was contemplating to use it on him instead of the steak before him. Kirua suppressed a shudder but he could feel a tingling sensation traveling up and down his spine. He wanted to get away but couldn't with his father looking on. He could feel the goosebumps slowly appearing on his arms, or it could just be because of the slight breeze that just then blew in from the window…_wait a minute_.

Everyone of the Zoaldyke family jerked straight up from his or her seat…well that is, except for the poor, _nen_-less Miruki who continued with his food. They had all felt something but it wasn't _nen_ or _zetsu_, it was another thing altogether and Kirua felt it most of all. "What was that!" they all asked in his or her version and as is usually the case when asking that type of question, you naturally look at the person in front of you.

Kirua looked at Irumi and Irumi looked at Kirua, and from that single moment, a new realization dawned on them:

"_I SOOO love my brother…_"

"_Please get him away from me!_"

XXXXXXXXX

"_Onii-chan_, _chotto matte_…please wait for me!" Kirua called out to his brother. It had been two days now that Kirua was always chasing after his brother Irumi. Now, they were out in the extensive grounds of the Zoaldyke estate as Irumi tried to hide from his younger brother by going through their forest.

Irumi leaped gracefully from tree to tree but Kirua was always not far behind him, like a cat he also jumped effortlessly from every branch. "_Onii-chan!_ _Since when had he called me that!_" Irumi asked himself, trying not to panic. Ever since that dinner two nights ago, he felt the all-consuming need to avoid his over-enthusiastic brother.

From a distance, Irumi saw Mike, their very huge, pet _dog_. He whistled to it and it obeyed at once. He patted its head when it came to him then he quickly whispered to it, "Go play with Kirua!" Off went the "dog" and after a few seconds, he could hear Kirua's protests as Mike probably licked him thoroughly. Irumi knew Kirua would be detained but he kept on going through the forest. He planned to cut through it and reach the mansion so he could get to his bedroom quickly and lock his door.

He entered through the mansion's service door, then looking quickly left and right, he made a dash up the winding staircase and ran like hell to his bedroom. "_Get a grip on yourself, Irumi_," he told himself silently as he reached his bedroom, "_You are the eldest son of the Zoaldykes, the greatest assassins in the world…you are the best…well, actually after father…and after grandfather_," Irumi amended then shook his head vigorously, "_Whatever, you're the third greatest assassin, you're_…Aaaaaarrgghh!"

"_Onii-chan_, is this your shampoo?" Kirua asked as he came from the bathroom holding a bottle and soap. Then he continued shyly, blushing all the while, "I want to grow my hair as long as yours, _onii-chan_. Too bad I inherited father's hair color but I can dye it black." Then he smelled the soap, "Hmmm…no wonder you always smell good, this is…"

"Out! Out!" Irumi fairly screamed as he pushed Kirua out the door. He bolted the locks and sealed it with his aura. Kirua tried to open it while pleading continuously, "My beloved brother, don't be so cruel to me…all I want is to be like you…to be with you…to be…"

"I can't take this anymore!" Irumi screamed inwardly. He saw his bedroom windows and contemplated jumping out of it. "But where would I go, Kirua knows all of our family holdings…" the knocks on the door got louder and louder and Irumi began to chew on his fingernails. "Where can I…Hisoka!" Irumi cried triumphantly as he whipped out his cellphone and dialed his friend's number.

"_Moshi-moshi_"

"Hisoka! Are you still there at the Celestial Tower, I'm coming to stay with you," Irumi's words came tumbling one after the other, "It's an emergency…"

"_Onii-chan_! Let me in! Who are you talking to!" Kirua asked suspiciously from the other side of the door.

"Why, Irumi," Hisoka said feigning surprise and trying to be coy, "This is so sudden, you moving in with me."

The panicked Irumi could now see that the aura enveloping his door was slowly thinning, he gave a small scream, "Omigod! Omigod! Hisoka! I'm coming there right now…OMIGOD! What am I SAYING!" Then he hang up, jumped through the window and ran as fast as he could, clutching his head all the while, "Aaaah! Ahahaha!"

XXXXXXXXX

Kirua heard and felt his brother leaving his room through the window. He quickly made a dash to their front door. He got out his cellphone and dialed Gon's number, "Gon, Kirua here, please meet me at the Celestial Tower as fast as you can. Pleeeeease!"

"You sound different Kirua, are you alright?"

"I don't think I ever will be, my _onii-chan_ is going to Hisoka and I need you to distract him, I know he likes you, so I could get my brother back."

In Whale Island, Gon took his phone away from his ear and stared at it for a few seconds before bringing it back again, "Oookaaay," he said slowly, "You're my friend Kirua but…"

"_Arigatou_, Gon! I know you wouldn't let me down. _Ja!_"

XXXXXXXXX

In another part of the mansion, Karuto was finishing his conversation on the phone, "_Hai_, I understand. All of us should be there. The Sky Battle Arena. I'll be going there now." He hang up with a small, satisfied smile and prepared to leave.

XXXXXXXXX

Cupid once again flapped his wings, grinning more mischievously as ever. He heard all three phone conversations and he now knew where to go next…


	3. Hisoka in a Love Triangle

**_Disclaimer:_** Yoshihiro Togashi owns Hunter X Hunter, not me 

**CUPID GONE WILD**

**Chapter 2:** Hisoka in a Love Triangle

Hisoka didn't exactly understand what Irumi was blabbering about on the phone but he sounded panicky and he was excitedly curious to see what a panic-stricken Irumi looked like. He looked around his room then thoughtfully at the lone king-size master bed. "_He'll just have to bear it_," Hisoka thought amusedly all the while grinning wickedly. Irumi didn't like anyone sleeping close to him especially those who moved in their sleep. Unfortunately, Hisoka tossed and turned in his sleep…_a lot _and he was sure he was going to do a lot of that tonight.

After a few hours later, Hisoka heard loud poundings on his door. He didn't have to ask who it was, he could feel Irumi's aura right through the door. "Irumi-_kun_, it's not nice to wake up the neighbors," Hisoka said mockingly as he opened the door to his friend, "What will they say, me entertaining visitors at this hour?"

But Irumi was in no condition to share Hisoka's joke, actually, he was in no condition to be aware of anything at all but his distress. "Quick! Close the door!" Irumi cried as he wrenched the door knob from Hisoka. He quickly slammed the door after him and bolted it mechanically and again with _nen_.

Hisoka was extremely mystified and amused as he saw his usually composed friend very agitated. Irumi's eyes were more than large and his usually beautifully combed hair stood out in ends in some places. "Does anyone know you're here?" he asked nervously.

Hisoka raised one perfectly groomed eyebrow, "You forget, I'm a floor master. I can come and go as I please."

"Then go to reception and tell them that you're not here," Irumi told him a little illogically and Hisoka raised his other eyebrow. "Don't just stand there, do it." Irumi unbolted the door, pushed his friend out then locked it again.

Hisoka stared a little perplexedly at the closed door but then he smiled a slow smile and decided to do what Irumi said, "Hmmm, this might be interesting…"

He sauntered his way to the reception desk and as he turned the corner, he ran smack right into Gon.

XXXXXXXXX

"Go, Gon! Ask them what room Hisoka is in."

"But Kirua," Gon protested, "Hisoka is a floor master, wouldn't he have the whole floor to himself?"

"We can't be sure. Hurry up, Gon," Kirua said impatiently. "I have to see my brother. I want to see him now!"

Gon scratched his head in confusion but dutifully approached the reception desk of the 200th floor. There was someone also turning round the corner to it and he glanced to see who it was. "Hisoka!" Gon gave a small squeak of fright then he clutched his chest. He blinked then looked at Hisoka again, "Hisoka…" he said slowly and there was a very warm tone to his voice.

XXXXXXXXX

In another room in the Celestial Tower…

"This is boring! We got to this floor in just a day," Feitan complained.

Sharnock tried to soothe him, "At least we got nice rooms."

"Are we starting the meeting?" Machi asked in a bored voice.

Sharnock turned to her, "Karuto's still not here."

Machi got up from the couch, "Then I'm going to watch and bet on the coming match," she said as she crossed the room and went out the door. The way to the arena passed through reception and she made her way there. As she rounded a corner, she thought she hit something because she faintly heard someone say, "Ooops!"

She was surprised because there was no one and was doubly surprised when she saw that kid named Gon, his hands clasped tightly together, looking up adorably, "_Yes, adorably_," Machi thought in surprise, at someone who had his back to her. She looked and saw that it was Hisoka. He had his eyes closed in pain while clutching the back of his head.

"Ow! My head! It feels like someone poked an arrow through it." Hisoka gasped in pain.

Machi affected a yawn and tried to pass but felt a sharp sting to her arm. "Wha−," she looked quickly and suspiciously at Hisoka to see if she was being attacked…but then, her hostility died away.

XXXXXXXXX

Hisoka opened his eyes then closed it again as his vision swam. He opened them again and he thought he saw everything in twos but then his vision cleared and he saw both Gon and Machi looking up at him, a strange look on both their faces. He started to say, "Why, it's my two fav−…for the love of God! Get away from me!" he shrieked and backed away as an inexplicable emotion passed over him and Gon started to approach him.

"Hisoka, _doushitano_? Are you hurt?" Gon asked softly, his large, innocent eyes filled with adoration. "Let me help you," he said as he put out a hand.

"Eeek! Don't touch me," Hisoka cried, still backing away.

"You heard him. Get away from him, brat!" Machi said sternly as she cut in front of Gon. "Go and play with someone your age. This is a matter between adults," she added the last in a sultry sort of voice all the while fluttering her eyelashes at Hisoka.

"Who are you calling brat, sister! I'm the one he likes so back off," Gon said heatedly, his hands curling into fists.

"Nothing doing! He's mine!" Machi retorted while she readied her thread.

"C'mon, Gon!" Kirua said as he took Gon's arm in a vise-like grip and dragged him away, "We have to find my _onii-chan_."

"No, Kirua! Let me be! That blue-haired witch is trying to kiss him! Noooo!" Gon cried as Kirua dragged him away. But he was no match for him.

Hisoka was now backed against the wall. Machi leaned forward and put her arms on either side of him, her face very close to his. Hisoka averted his face from Machi and pressed his body closer to the wall away from her. "Are you free tonight?" Machi asked in low, sexy voice, "Why don't we have dinner together?"

Hisoka shuddered and said, "Eeeeww!"

"Ah…er…um," someone tried to say and both Hisoka and Machi looked at the interruption. It was Sharnock, and he was having a hard time trying to say something. Nobunaga and Phinx were with him, their eyes wide and both agog with astonishment at the scene before them.

"Er, Machi…that's Hisoka," Phinx pointed out, trying to be helpful. Machi just glared at him.

"We don't have time for this," Nobunaga said trying to overcome his shock. "Snap out of it, Machi. We have to go." He said as he approached her and took her arm while Phinx swiftly took the other.

They dragged her away while Machi continued to struggle and cry out in protest. "You'll thank us for this later," Sharnock said consolingly. He looked back at Hisoka and was taken aback to see that Hisoka was already running away as fast as he could.

XXXXXXXXX

It was a pathetic sight to see two grown-up, well-built and obviously capable young men quickly piling up things against the door as if their life depended on it. But Hisoka and Irumi were doing just that, putting furniture and what-nots to the door while Gon and Kirua were on the other side, pounding and trying to push their way into Hisoka's room.

"_Onii-chan_! Why are you doing this? Please let me in!" Kirua said pleadingly.

"Hisoka! Are you mad at me? Did that witch do anything to you?" Gon called out.

Hisoka and Irumi doubled their efforts. The phone rang. "Eeep!" they both jumped and cried in surprise. Hisoka tentatively reached for the phone and answered a little hysterically, "_Moshi-mosh_…"

"Hisoka! Why did you turn off your cellphone!" It was Machi and her voice was shrill. "Why won't you have dinner with me?"

"Machi," Hisoka said sternly, fighting hysteria and putting one hand to his hip, "I wouldn't go out with you even if you were the last woman on earth!" he banged the phone down. Then he quickly went to the windows, opened them and started to climb out.

"Hey, what are you doing!" Irumi cried out.

"Escaping, what else!"

"Wait for me," Irumi swiftly crossed the room to follow, "But where are we going?"

"To Kunwari City," Hisoka explained a little distractedly as they made their way down (a long way down) the Celestial Tower. "Kuroro is hiding there, he can put us up."

It was unfortunate…or not, for the sake of the story…that Karuto had just arrived in the Spider's room and looked out the window because he saw and heard everything. After a few minutes, Gon and Kirua burst into the room.

"Alright! Where is he!" Gon demanded hotly as he glared at Machi. The other Spiders raised their eyebrows in shock and surprise.

"_Nani_! You mean Hisoka-_chan_ is missing!" Machi asked shrilly.

"Missing?" Karuto asked calmly. "My brother and he are going to Kuroro-_sama_ in Kunwari City."

Gon, Kirua and Machi ran from the room…

XXXXXXXXX

Cupid clapped his hands in glee. Never mind that he poked the wrong arrow to the clown because that girl bumped into him. This was turning out to be better than he expected. He started to fly away and thought, "_I wonder who Kuroro is?_"


	4. Kurapika, Love thine Enemy

_**A/N: **Minna-san_, thanks for the reviews and even to those who read it but don't review. At least you read it. :) Yes, yes, I know Irumi is OOC, actually, everyone of them should be because of those arrows +wink+.

Sorry about the spellings, I'm not sure about Zoaldyke and I tend to put 'r' instead of 'l' because Nippongo does not have 'l', that's why the problem with Leorio's name. You can hear it in the anime. Does anyone have the manga guide for the character names' spellings? They're a bit weird I know but please email it to me, _arigatou_!

**_Disclaimer:_** Yoshihiro Togashi owns Hunter X Hunter, not me 

**CUPID GONE WILD**

**Chapter 3:** Kurapika, Love thine Enemy

Kurapika drove as fast as he could to their boss' private airfield. He had just hanged up on a very agitated Leorio. Apparently, he had been in the city and was surprised to see Gon and Kirua with Machi, running as fast as they could to the airport. Leorio wasn't able to catch up with them, probably because of his none-able-to-see-yet nen abilities, so when he reached the airport, they were already gone in an airship. He was able to ask one of the staff though and had found out that the three of them were going to Kunwari City.

Kurapika only knew of one person slightly connected with that city. It was almost a ghost town near York Shin City and it was near that knoll where they had left Kuroro. "_What were they thinking!_" Kurapika thought a little angrily as he arrived at the airfield and boarded the private airship. "_If Kuroro does anything to them, I'm going to kill him this time_."

Well, Kurapika spoke too soon.

XXXXXXXXX

Kuroro was in a very bad mood. He had been enjoying another very peaceful day of doing nothing at all but staring deep into space and thinking about the many wicked ways he was going to take revenge on the chain guy when he had that blasted sword of judgment removed from him.

But no, here he was patrolling the perimeter of his own hideout because those two blasted nuisances dared to show up on his doorstep. As if that wasn't enough, those two, Hisoka and Irumi, threatened him…_him_, Kuroro!…that they were going to shred his lovely cloak if he didn't go outside and make sure nobody gets inside. Of course he loved his cloak!

He was still confused about that. Hisoka and Irumi weren't all too clear in explaining why there were here. It had something to do with the kids named Gon and Irumi's brother Kirua…and even Machi was involved. He didn't have time to get all the details because they had rudely pushed him outside.

"Just you wait," Kuroro muttered to himself grimly, "When I get to use nen again, you're both also going to be on my hit list." Then he smiled maliciously at the thought and started to hum happily his favorite requiem all the while swinging his sledgehammer, a weapon he now usually carried for protection.

"Psssst!"

"Huh?" Kuroro spun around, at the same time, he felt a sharp sensation to his chest. There was a movement in the bushes behind him. Cautiously, he approached then ever so slowly parted the branches, weapon at the ready.

He came face to face with a surprised Kurapika.

XXXXXXXXX

"_YOU!_"

He and Kuroro said at the same time. He was surprised because he didn't feel Kuroro approaching or was it because he had felt a sting to his chest and didn't concentrate? Whatever the reason, he was now in front of the man who was responsible for the death of his whole tribe. One look at his face and he would feel all the hatred coming back, one look at those eyes…"_Gosh, those eyes! Are they really that beautiful?_" Kurapika thought as a warm and curious sensation enveloped him.

Kuroro was also looking at him, a sort of rapturous wonder on his face, "Chain guy?" he said a little hoarsely.

"It's Kurapika."

"Oh…Kurapika"

"Kuroro"

"Kurapika"

"Kuroro"

Well, they would have gone on and on if Kuroro hadn't dropped the sledgehammer on his foot as he reached for Kurapika's face. "Yeow!"

"Oh! Oh! Are you hurt?" Kurapika asked with great concern as he reached out a hand.

Kuroro took that hand. "It is of no concern. Don't let it distress you."

Kurapika blushed but he took Kuroro's other hand in his own. They stayed that way for a few minutes just looking at each other's eyes and clasping hands until finally, Kuroro remembered some manners.

"Would…would you like to come inside?" Kuroro asked a little shyly. "I have some pests, er, I mean guests staying with me but I won't let them bother you."

Kurapika also nodded a little shyly and let himself be guided by Kuroro as he led the way inside the building.

Now, if Hisoka and Irumi were shocked at seeing Kuroro holding hands with Kurapika as they entered, they didn't show it.

When Kuroro and Kurapika sat facing each other on the couch and stroked each other's hair, Irumi tried to look bored while Hisoka played with his cards.

But when Kuroro and Kurapika started to tickle each other and giggle like five-year olds, Irumi contemplated doing hara-kiri on the spot while Hisoka debated whether to join in or not.

Fortunately, they didn't have to do any such decisions because they heard loud noises outside. It was the sound of running amidst cries of "Onii-chaaaan!" "Hisoka, my love!" and "He's mine!"

Hisoka and Irumi looked at each other in apprehension while Kuroro and Kurapika looked up from what they were doing, both annoyed at being interrupted.

Like an animal trapped, Hisoka and Irumi decided to end their cowardice once and for all although their hands were shaking as Irumi took out his needles while Hisoka shuffled his cards. As for Kuroro…well, he was still holding hands with Kurapika.

"Oh no, my love," Kurapika said adoringly to Kuroro, "I wouldn't want you to get hurt. Would you like me to remove the sword of judgment I put on you?"

"Of course not, my love," Kuroro said a little hurt, "You gave it to me and anything you give, I'll treasure always."

_See, what fools are made by love?_

XXXXXXXXX

Cupid surveyed the scene before him. He was so pleased with what he had done. He clapped and did somersaults in the air. "_Now on to other pastures_," he said to himself happily. He flew up, so distracted and smug with the great mischief he caused that he didn't look where he was going. He collided with a massive form.

That massive form was the king of the gods himself, Zeus.


	5. Love is due for a Rude Awakening

**_A/N: _**Yep! Last chapter so first things first, acknowledgements to obsessed dreamer, BlackWolfofFire, kiseki-girl, IloveanimeIlovelife, fiore777, dark672 (Should have done this too in my earlier fic! Oh well…)

And again, since last chapter, there's a handful of Greek myth characters, _gomen_!

**_Disclaimer:_** Yoshihiro Togashi owns Hunter X Hunter, not me 

**CUPID GONE WILD**

**Chapter 4:** Love is due for a Rude Awakening

Zeus was in a towering rage. He had just got back from another…_yet another_… clandestine meeting with another…_yet another_…woman. Oh he loved his wife, Hera, but one couldn't ignore a pretty face after all. Besides, he did always come back to her and it wasn't always his fault. It was also because of that demmed arrows that the god of love sometimes shoots him with.

This particular affair however was relatively short-lived, only a few hundred years or so compared to his other affairs. That may be due to the fact that Hera had been extra vigilant and extra…well…_violent_ considering that he recovered from Cupid's arrow of love just by a mind-numbing slap from his enraged wife.

So thus recovered, he had been of course angry at Cupid for putting him in his wife's black books _yet again_ but was doubly angry when he discovered what Cupid had been doing for the last centuries or so. He felt chagrined that he wouldn't be able to rectify the love (and hate for some) relationships that the seemingly crazed god brought about on some of the unlikeliest partners Zeus had ever seen! They were now either married, already have a family or well, dead. It _has_ been a few centuries after all.

However, he could do something about Cupid's most recent antics. A good thing too because he had never seen a more odd-looking group than this one gathered at…what was the name of this place again…oh yeah, Kunwari City. So he had materialized at once in front of a startled Cupid, grabbed him by his wings, teletransported and dunked him headfirst in the River Styx.

The river worked its divine powers, as always, on Cupid. That and upon surfacing, he was treated to an ear-splitting bellow, "WHAT IN MY NAME HAVE YOU BEEN DOING ALL THIS TIME!"

XXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile, Hisoka and Irumi's bravado evaporated quickly as it had come. Gon, Kirua and Machi had entered Kuroro's hideout like excited, stampeding bulls. Kirua was now at Irumi's hip, hugging him fiercely while his brother desperately tried to get away. Gon was holding on to one of Hisoka's leg while Machi had her arms around his neck. Poor Hisoka was shaking Gon off at the same time, disentangling Machi's arms. As for Kuroro? Still holding hands with Kurapika.

Kirua said, "Love your hands, love your eyes, love your hair, lov−..."

Machi said, "I kill people, you kill people. We have a lot in common. I'm cool, you're hot. See? We're perfectly matched.

Gon retorted, "Hah! Opposites attract. I'm immature, he's mature. I'm innocent, he's…er…not."

Kuroro said, "Honey cakes"

Kurapika answered, "Tweedlekins"

Those two are hopeless.

_TWANG! TWANG! _ It was the sound of several arrows swishing through the air. Not one of them even noticed but each arrow hit with perfect accuracy its intended target. Unlike Cupid's earlier arrows however, the effect of these special arrows weren't instantaneous but gradual, and curiously enough, it was Kuroro who recovered first.

Like a very bad hangover, when you get a huge headache _and also _remember every humiliating detail of your drunken state, Kuroro remembered. Being the sly fox he was, he quickly turned to Kurapika and said in the most lover-like tone he could muster, "Ah, honey cakes…about that sword of judgment. Would you remove it so I could use _nen_ again? You'd like that, won't you?"

"Of course, my love," Kurapika said sweetly while Kuroro tried to hide a wicked smile. Kurapika leaned forward, his face very near to Kuroro, then he swung backwards and gave Kuroro a sharp upper cut! "Fat chance, you murdering creep!"

Kuroro lay sprawled, semi-conscious on the floor.

"Legooffme! Icanfbreaf!" Kirua's smothered voice could be heard coming from Irumi's middle. Irumi was hugging his brother close to his chest, very close and very tight while Kirua continued to struggle, his arms locked at his sides.

"But I thought you wanted to be close to me?" Irumi asked innocently, a small nasty smile on his otherwise expressionless face.

Gon had landed on the floor the last time Hisoka shook him away. He looked dazedly up, blinked several times and cried, "WAAAH!" Kurapika immediately covered Gon's eyes.

Machi and Hisoka were kissing…but not for long. Machi all at once stopped, glared at Hisoka and pushed him roughly away. "Do you have a death wish?"

"Ah, Machi…_you_ were kissing _me_, remember?"

And so one by one, each of them shook off the effects of Cupid's spell, each of them remembered, each of them returned to normal…"You missed one," Zeus pointed out to Cupid.

It was Hisoka. "Er, no, my lord…that's his normal state," Cupid explained. Hisoka was slightly drooling, probably thinking about his missed chance with Machi.

"Oh," Zeus said, still a little doubtful if that clown _was really _normal. Then he shrugged. Even _he _couldn't tamper with the natural order of things. "Alright, if that's all of them. I'm taking you back to Olympus," Zeus said sternly but there was an unholy glint in his eyes. "I think it's time that you get a dose of your own medicine."

Cupid scoffed that off, being the god of love, he had a great advantage, "Really, my lord. I'm immune to that."

Zeus smiled enigmatically, "We'll see about that. Her name's Psyche." He started to ascend into the heavens but stopped as he remembered something. "I seem to recall Apollo pestering me all these years about your whereabouts."

Cupid flushed a deep red.

Zeus continued with a frown, "You do know that I've turned myself into a bull, a swan, a vagabond, etcetera because of your love arrows, don't you?" Cupid nodded a little fearfully, then was surprised when Zeus laughed, "But Apollo is a tree lover…_literally_!" He chuckled heartily once more before disappearing in the skies.

Cupid heaved a sigh of relief then followed suit. He didn't get far because Apollo suddenly came from nowhere. "Caught you at last, you little twerp!" Apollo cried triumphantly as he seized a struggling Cupid. His action upset the quiver of arrows Cupid had on his back and they all came tumbling down. Cupid and Apollo watched in horror as the mortals below them were once again stunned by the shower of arrows.

They were all arrows of love.

"Ow!" They all said.

Gon was looking at Irumi, Irumi was looking at Kuroro, Kuroro was looking at Hisoka, Hisoka was looking at Kurapika, Kurapika was looking at Machi and Machi was looking at Kirua.

Cupid and Apollo looked at each other in trepidation, "_Uh-oh_"

- OWARU -


End file.
